What a day-Wednesday :)

So I think it will really help me to just blog constantly about this whole journey. Its really about every small decision you make. So I think this will really help me focus and figure it all out. Last week I hit a low point and nearly gave up when I gained 3 pounds when I seriously ate clean and worked my ass off at the gym. I felt like giving up. I really let it get to me and just cried and felt sorry for myself. I finally realized that I really do want this, and for me I think I need to workout even more and I will see success.

Oh wow! So tonight I really brought it. Backing up, I felt like foodwise I was a bit too snacky earlier today, but I did all right. Its like 80% what you eat, so I really need to remember that and perfect my choices. So there is always room for improvement.
But working out wowsers! So I’ve been saying all week that I need to do double workout. I keep saying it but didn’t do it yet. Yes I worked out Sunday-Tuesday, but just the normal workout.

For me I think I just really need to kick it up a notch. So when I get home from work I did an hour of cardio. This was an intense hour. I have some new videos, but I looked at some that were burned for me a while back from some former coworkers at Ingenix. So I had one of Jillian’s videos. It wasn’t very long, but holy intense. I mean you are jumping rope, doing jumping jacks and all in double time with no rests. Even Jillian is sweating like crazy from her own workout. It was seriously intense. And its interesting my attitude about it. I have always had that competitive part of my personality that I’m constantly having to fight. Many times I’ve gotten all mad that they can do more than me, so I have to really stop myself from killing myself and remember that they are half or 1/3 my weight so its impossible to do exactly the same at some points. And yet there is that other side that you have to fight of being lazy. Like Heather (Adam’s trainer) says, I’m the fittest fat person she has ever met. So I really do have to push myself hard. Its all about finding the right balance for yourself where you are pushing hard but not killing yourself and causing injury. But watching the biggest loser, I’ve learned you can push yourself harder than you think.

Jillian’s kickboxing video is so killer. It would work out really fit people . I fought my damnest to keep up. There is so much jumping going on. Its hard for fat people to jump (not to mention frightening to watch lol). But I made myself do the jump rope etc. The only thing I really had an issue with was the jumping jacks. The first round I just jogged in place. But then I made myself do them the next few sets. I could only do 10 o the 30 and not double time like the rest of them, but I was damn proud of myself. Sweat was just flowing off of me like a river, so that is when I know I’m pushing it and giving 110%. So after that I did 40 minutes of a dance cardio workout. There was a lot of jumping etc in that too. I was dying because yesterday the biggest Loser Bootcamp one had you do tons of squats and lunges, as did both workouts today. I remember doing this dance one before, but I really kicked it up and tried to keep up with them and jump just like they do so it was intense and a great workout.

Then after Adam got home it was off to the gym for more cardio. I did 30 on the Precor machine and then 30 on the elliptical. The whole time I just kept thinking push, push push and imagine if I was on the biggest loser how hard they would push you. You just have to be your own little trainer. Its easy to lose focus and just kind of daydream. If you aren’t really focusing, you just aren’t really doing that much. On the precor there was a few moments I had to slow it down when I had this killer sideache but I just worked through it.

On the treadmill I was determined to do what I haven’t done for years. I wanted to jog the entire 30. Rah, damn sideaches. I had to stop for 7. But 23 minutes is the best I’ve done in a long time. So yeah the goal was to reach 3000 calories to burn today, and so far the bodybugg says 4161 with a couple hours still left. Wahoo!!!!

So I just need to keep this intensity, this motivation. It takes your focus all day long. I'm really proud of myself today.